Hey there, Bird Gang.
BIRD CRIMES backers know this year didn't start off great for me. And, unfortunately, contrary to pretty much every effort possible, it's not ending...
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Ken Fiskorne
11 days ago
TONIGHT IS THE NIGHT! Five hours left, go finish your surveys.
Good evening, Bird Gang!
This is a quick one before I head out for the night: I'll be locking orders, and closing preorders, at midnight tonight.
Double, triple ch...
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Ken Fiskorne
12 days ago
ONE DAY LEFT ON SURVEYS + PREORDER STORE
Good evening, bird gang!
We're down to the wire: I will be locking orders, and closing the preorder store, tomorrow night.
If you are a backer, make absolutely sure yo...
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Ken Fiskorne
13 days ago
Two days left on surveys! + Charity sticker bundle
Good evening, bird gang!
Here with your nightly, annoying reminder: we need more surveys filled out.
You have two days until December 7th, when orders lock and preorders cl...
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Ken Fiskorne
14 days ago
89% of surveys done... three days left, can we get that higher?
Good evening, bird gang! Hitting you with a late one today.
We have three days left on GOLDEN AGE PARROTS' surveys. Can you go tell me what you'd like in your pledge?
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Ken Fiskorne
15 days ago
Four days left... you done your survey!
Good evening, bird gang!
Back with the world's worst advent calendar: you get nothing for opening these emails every day, except me nagging you.
We have 14% of you who h...
BIRD CRIMES backers know this year didn't start off great for me. And, unfortunately, contrary to pretty much every effort possible, it's not ending great, either.
The long and short of it: the $2000 or so I budgeted to out-of-pocket costs for GOLDEN AGE PARROTS is going to insurance deductibles on my stolen truck.
To make sure I can get you guys what you paid for, I am making the difficult choice to reopen surveys, and cut several designs from GAP.
There are a lot of things happening in 2024, and a lot of reasons I've had to do this.
I didn't get to vend at Anthrocon this year due to unforseen circumstances. I lost a lot of money in potential sales, a rental car, and an extra night in Pittsburgh after a sudden, acute illness from a bad drink (thanks, furries! Stay classy, you lowlifes.) This is in the low thousands, and it was money I was looking forward to using for repairs on my truck and rebuilding a solid retail stock.
I lost two pets this year, and had a lot of health scares with others. This has been rough, emotionally, but financially it's cut a lot of my free spending money I wanted to drop into rebuilding the HUSTLE.
I had a semi-emergency move at the end of November, which ended with needing to abandon a lot of crucial stuff at the apartment under threat of violence from an unstable family member. This was planned, but the pace and final few days weren't. I've lost a lot of my work time on commission and design work, which are big money makers, to being harassed by a belligerent drunk letting my dog soil the house or get into garbage and need ER trips.
Frankly, GAP didn't meet its "real" expectations for funding. It met its base goal, but it didn't do as well as expected. I planned goals based on a higher backer turnout. I took some risks that paid off... and some that, sadly, didn't. We have enough to cover all of production, but we didn't make enough to comfortably cover mold fees for some of the less popular designs. This is a flat $80-150 per design up-front that isn't worth the investment unless pins will sell retail.
I planned for all this, but, I didn't plan for someone to hot wire, joy ride, and deep fry my truck's ignition and electricals last Sunday. We don't know the extent of the mechanical damage yet, and there is a small chance it may be totaled.
These clowns smoked in my truck, destroyed some interior upholstery, and, via contamination, caused about a $500 loss in plush stock and porous packaging materials that were still in the back seat. This includes my mailers left over from BIRD CRIMES... which were going to save me some money on GAP. This isn't a dealbreaker, but, it is extremely, extremely frustrating.
My insurance deductible for any car work (including diagnostics) is $1000, and while I have an insurance-comped rental, it's still about $45 a day with additional insurance. I work two "real" jobs and, as much as I'd like to not have to do it, this is a necessary expense. This'll cap out at halfway to $2,000 on its own if I max out the days allotted.
That is about the last of my expendable money that isn't rent. I am refusing to use any of GAP's funds for personal expenses. But... I can either make less popular designs, that I may not make back an investment on, or I can pay rent this month.
And, with how things are going, I need to pay my rent.
Let's talk what this means for you.
What pins are being cut? With some exceptions for stuff I know will sell in retail sales (like the macaws, kakapo, crows, and blue jays), I unfortunately have to make the call on most pins ordered less than 9 times. This is mostly going to be 1" minis and 2" pins.
For full transparency, these are the current numbers. Any pin highlighted in yellow here will be cut.
For mobile readers, this is the loser's club:
MINIS: African Gray, Buncho, Cartoon Crow, Sun Conure
What's going to happen to the pins that are cut? At this point, I plan to offer them as stretch goals if I run another GOLDEN AGE birds campaign. Extremely unpopular designs (with 5 or less ordered) may not come back, or they may be offered as preorders if I want to bulk out stock in the future. I'm not sure when either of these things will happen, but I'd like to complete the 3-pin sets for each bird eventually.
Are any other items being cut? Nope. All 2" stickers, sticker sheets, GUNBIRD pins + stickers, are safe. These either do not have a minimum quantity that would make them impossible to manufacture, or they were promised to you and budgeted into the campaign before shit happened.
All custom pins (both morphs and 50x full customs) will also still be delivered as promised.
I wanted one of these pins... what do I do? I am reaching out individually to all backers between tonight, and the middle of this week.
Keep an eye out for an email from me.
You'll get a list of your affected pin designs.
I am offering a substitute + $2 store credit for every subbed pin. In the event you aren't interested, at all, in substitutes, I can offer you a full retail store credit ($16/14/8) for each pin size you no longer want.
Once you've decided what you want to do, go back into your survey, make your swap, and confirm with me that you've finalized everything.
I will re-close surveys and re-charge cards on December 26th.
I am also re-opening the GOLDEN AGE PARROTS preorder store, just in case you do want to get some pins you missed. You can, and should, pick up only the designs that aren't being cut - unless you order 10+ of one that isn't making it, it will not make a difference. That'll also close on the 26th.
I will also, unfortunately, be pulling out of Pintopia 2025 to focus on a backup queue of more immediately profitable freelance work. I have already notified both BackerKit, as well as my business partner Alstro Arts. Merch-wise, I will be focusing my first quarter of 2025 on GOLDEN AGE's fulfillment, as well as COOP CO-OP's. BREED STANDARD dog pins will launch at some point in the future, but I don't have an estimate for this.
This is a really, really shitty situation, and it's unprecedented for me and the HUSTLE. I'm sorry this affects all of you.
If you have any questions, or concerns, before you get your substitute email, you're welcome to email me at [email protected]. Let's take care of this.
This is a quick one before I head out for the night: I'll be locking orders, and closing preorders, at midnight tonight.
Double, triple check that you have your survey done, and bought everything you want from GOLDEN AGE PARROTS! It's your last chance to add more pins, or cash in your pledge.
If you are UNABLE TO DO YOUR SURVEY for any reason, email me at [email protected] as soon as possible and we can rain check you.
If you are interested in a preorder, go do that, too! Remember: a few high-demand birdies are available, even though they weren't unlocked.
We're down to the wire: I will be locking orders, and closing the preorder store, tomorrow night.
If you are a backer, make absolutely sure you got your survey in. I will not be honoring requests to do them late, or refunding late backers in most circumstances. You guys should know the drill by now.
You will be able to add more addon items to your order until then, too. Cards will likely charge addons and shipping on Monday, December 9th.
Tomorrow will also be your last day to get preorder pins. If you missed GOLDEN AGE PARROTS' funding period, or wanted to wait until the end to see the full available stock... this is your time!
Hop on in, and grab your pins! Who are you getting? Maybe our cute 2" cockatiel (or his 1.5" color morph option sets)? Our nostalgic cartoon crow? Maybe the magnificent scarlet or hyacinth macaw? You've got options, just pick before tomorrow night.
There are lots of color variants and stretch goals that weren't in the "unlocked" campaign. Check them out!
I am closing out a very, very busy week at work tomorrow, but I will finally be sitting down and finalizing all the artwork for GOLDEN AGE PARROTS' production this Sunday. I might livestream some of it, depending on what time it's at, and what mood I'm in.
Thank you for your support this far, and I hope you are having a happy holiday season so far!
Good evening, bird gang! Hitting you with a late one today.
We have three days left on GOLDEN AGE PARROTS' surveys. Can you go tell me what you'd like in your pledge?
11% of backers still need to pick pins. That might be you - please check your Backerkit "Your Pledges & Surveys" page - if you backed a physical tier, you WILL have a survey.
Orders are going to lock on December 7th, and you'll no longer be able to submit survey responses or add new items.
Our preorder store will also be closing on December 7th. Check that out if you missed the campaign, but want some GOLDEN AGE PARROT pins and stickers!
I promised a shop link yesterday for some items, and unfortunately, I have to apologize: I didn't have time to set that up today, and I have to run to bed to open early tomorrow. I should have that set tomorrow evening.
Take it easy this Wednesday night, and if you're in the Northern US like me, stay warm.
Here with your nightly, annoying reminder: we need more surveys filled out.
You have two days until December 7th, when orders lock and preorders close.
I will not be allowing late surveys on this project due to the huge variety of pins I have to order.
Go double check that yours is done, and if you didn't receive one, you can check via "Your Pledges & Surveys" on BackerKit.
It's not as urgent (a few more days off), but, go ahead and make sure your credit card on file is current, too. Even if your first campaign charge is covered, I can't ship your stuff if your shipping fee or addons fail.
Before I go, I want to plug something else real quick: I've been sitting on a hurricane recovery benefit sticker for a little while, and while I've experienced nothing as bad as Milton, life's been keeping me away from launching it till now.
I am offering a benefit sticker bundle for my friend Alala to start covering a truly heinous $15k bill her insurance is refusing to cover. This is an unavoidable, infuriating incident from the city infrastructure failing, and she couldn't have prepared for the flood damage that gutted her house. It won't cover much, but, it'll help put a dent in that number.
For $10, you can grab a 3.5" painted-style vinyl sticker, a 6x4 sheet of peppy African painted dogs, and three LITTLE SHITS 1" stickers of some animals she holds close to her heart.
We're running these until 12/12. They will be ordered with the GAP vinyl stickers, and probably go out early 2025. About $8 of each purchase will go straight to her, or if you just want to donate, pop on in to her ko-fi site.
